I Hate Integers

Submitted By Cine_Man

They don't allow for any shades of grey... they're so imprecise!

All I want to do is create a nice chart showing the accumulated kilometers for the F1 drivers season. There are 1,073 laps in the season. The total number of kilometers covered is 5,169.48 -- not 5,169, and not 5,170. How can I show that last 480 meters?

So if I try to graph the whole season side to side on a table that will fit on an 800x600 display... I get 32 pixels per race. Thats, on average, 2 laps per pixel. So some drivers' results are going to be a mess... even if they completed a lap... I can't honestly show any progress! or if the finishers were a lap down at the finish... do I show them 2 laps back, or even with the winners? Damned integers...

Editors Note: 69 is an integer- surely you like that one!

Mobile Phones in Cars

Submitted By Henrik, Switzerland

Something that really drives me crazy is people using their mobile phones while driving. Not a day goes by without seeing a car move randomly across that road in front of me.

I ride a motorcycle to work everyday, and simply can't stand being gently pushed over by some idiot talking on his phone. There have now been a number of fatalities resulting from this misuse of phones. I would really hate to buy the farm just because somebody was on the phone.

Editors Note: Even ET waited till he was off the space-craft before saying.... Phone Home!

Government Funding For Shamu Croaks

Submitted By Henrik, Switzerland

I can't believe that not all members of the Shamu Croaks forum have not signed the petition demanding government funding. If there is one cause that deserves to receive funding, it is the Shamu Croaks site.

Sign the petition!

Editors Note: Thanks Henrik- couldn't have said it better myself! Its about time the government spent the tax dollars wisely! To sign the petition goto...http://www.petitiononline.com/GovSham/petition.html

Two Rants!

Submitted By Wycco, Greenville, SC

Alltel are the biggest buncha losers on the planet! I spend an hour on the phone trying to receive information about a plan they have- and they pass me on a never ending circle of losers! Finnally I end up back with the woman I started with! I told her that I know it wasn't necessarily her fault, and for her not to take it personally- but to tell her Boss to kiss my ass- and shove a brick up his own ass!

Secondly- I'm pissed at the guy I purchased my computer from- first the video card doesn't work- and I need to wait a month to get it replaced- now the modem doesn't work! GRRRRRRRRRRR!!!!!!!

Editors Note: I'm told Alltel are looking into ways to kiss someones ass over the phone!

Why are the people at pay less shoes SOOOOOO stupid!!!!

Submitted By Heather, work

I bought some shoes that had to be ordered and they never called me to pick them up. The reason, we're too busy. So i guess I was supossed to get a physcic feeling as to when they were ready.

Editors Note: Rant-2-Me recommends you visit your psychic on a regular basis- mine told me I'd become a millionaire overnight with the web-site!

Can't Any Of Y'all Spell Hypocrite Correctly?

Submitted By Yo' Mama, KissMyAss, Texas

I've read three posts now with the word "Hypocrite" spelt "Hypocrit". Whats wrong with you morons? And whats wrong with the Editor? You suck man! What the hell are you smoking? Why can't you do your job and edit? Now go pucker up them lips of yours boy, because here is my ass!

Editors Note: I love you too! Note: I copy people's quotes word for word- any errors are theres alone. Thank you Yo'Momma thor pointing out theeror of my wayes!

AA Are Hypocrits

Spartacus., Charlotte, NC

Well it seems everyone is on the Hypocrit kick right now. I just wanted to rant and call the AA hypocrits. Alcoholics Anonymous, thats what they call themselves, yet, are they anonymous? Oh No... One of their steps is to apologize to everyone they hurt (thanks Seinfeld, I learnt something from your show). So really Alcoholics Anonymous should be called Alcoholics Whose Names We Know! Sorry... Thats All... Nothing Against AA- except that they need a name change!

Editors Note: I think Spartacus. was drinking for that post!

Mister Blue

Submitted By [Name Not Supplied]

Hi, I just wanted to post a rant about Mr Blue's Rant if thats OK- can you just post that I think Mr Blue's submission makes no sense. He calls people that don't like him sleeping with animals Hypocrits, Why? To be a hypocrit, the people complaining about Mr Blue's animal relations would have to be sleeping with animals themselves. Could you please post this on your site? Thanks bud!

Editors Note: Maybe they are sleeping with animals- I don't know who is criticising Mr. Blue.

The Forum Is Down *Updated*

Submitted By The Editor

*[Since this rant xsorbit has upgraded their servers- Thanks xsorbit for a quick response and a job well done]*

Gasp... the forum seems to be having problems more lately than not having problems- xsorbit, the company that hosts my board- take forever to respond to help questions- Still I suppose I shouldn't complain too much- personally I think the board they offer is awesome- and it is free without adverts (I've no earthly idea how they make money!- probably explains why they don't hire many people in support!)

Its just frustrating- hits are down on the forum lately- and I bet the fact its always down is the reason- fear not though- I am TRYING contacting them and hope to have it up sooner or later!

Editors Note: Is it a sign of insanity to rant to myself?

Self Righteous Hypocrits

Submitted By Mr. Blue

Why Are people against people who want to perform acts of loving to animals? If that person enjoys it- and the animal enjoys it why not? I love the look on my puppy's face when I give him that special loving! Even Goldfish can be casually exciting.

Why are animalists so frowned on? Whats worse about sleeping with animals then say- wanting women to sit on your face- or being whipped- or being peed on. People should learn that animals need loving too!

Editors Note: As a wise man once said- You can love your pets- just don't looooooove them!

My Dogs Are Barking

Submitted By CatWoman.

My feet hurt really bad. Its all I can think about right now. The pain is all over, especially on the bottom.

I hate my job. Mean people produce little mean people. I hate two year olds since I have to work with them.

I hate my fiancee, because hes not rubbing my feet right now. He needs to give me some good loving.

Editors Note: Never try to get your fianceť to contribute to your website- or she'll bash you to the world!

Paint the side-walks illuminous yellow

Submitted By Spartacus.

Everywhere you look is dogdoo- that sticky brown crap- that sticks to your shoes- and gets stuck under your finger nails when you try and remove it from your souls. Why must we deal with the doodoo that plagues our lives?

There is one solution that I have heard echoed by last centuries political geniuses. Paint the side-walks of our streets and towns glow-in-the-dark yellow. Let us see what we are stepping in at night!

The only other solution is to kill all the dogs, a solution PETA would be appalled by- besides if we kill all the dogs what are the people in Malaysia going to eat? So people rally your local politicians- let the world have illuminous yellow sidewalks! THANKS!

Editors Note: Use a stick not a finger to remove dog doo from your shoes!

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